Day 20 :: some days are rougher than others
My dad died on November 20th. I think. But I’m not certain of it. It is one of those dates that really seems as if it SHOULD stick— forever and without a doubt—in my mind, especially for someone like me who is basically good with dates and details. However, it doesn’t. I know what this is about. I have a mental block. I don’t want to remember it. If I remember the date, I have to also remember the details of that week and other things that my mind will immediately associate with this part of November such as when John Kennedy was shot and sometimes even US Thanksgiving which wasn’t always the best holiday for me.
Both John Kennedy and Corey Shepard—these good, interesting and smart men—have been gone a very long time. I was pregnant with my second son when my dad died and he is now 27 years old. But it will always make me sad that they died young and unfinished.
We are smartest when we appreciate life even through all the hardships and challenges and sad days that are rougher than others.
Yesterday I got a rejection letter. It was a wonderfully personal and NICE rejection letter. But it still hurt. I’ve always said that they’re like getting kicked in the shin. It’s a sudden unexpected sharp pain that doesn’t last long, then it’s sore for a little while and then you move on and don’t think about it much. Today, it’s still a little tender.
Small wounds and large, we sometimes just have an achy day to get through.
Comments
I wish you strength to get through this. Writing about it maybe softens the edges of the pain a little, but the sadness will always be there I think …
So sad your dad died so early in life.
Some tough memories. I was to young to remember Kennedy being shot but we all have those times we care not to remember but can’t avoid.
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